Is admitting your first book isn’t THE ONE.


Trust me, I’m still trying to come to terms with this realisation. It’s a hard one to come to, to put something you’ve loved so dearly into a drawer and decide you’ll pull it out again at some point… or maybe never again. I’ve sadly hit that point with my first second novel.


The first was the easy one to put aside. It’s the book I wrote in high school and I found it again the last time I was home. I flipped through it, shuddered, and threw it in the back of my closet where it will never again see the light of day. I know it’s there and that’s enough. The fact is, we all have our “first” novel. The one we never admit we wrote, but, like all writing it was a learning experience.


Then there came the second book. The one you pour your heart and soul into. For me? This is an idea that’s been running around my brain for the past ten or so years. It started in high school, I attempted part of it for NaNo one year… but it wasn’t until last year that I actually sat down and wrote it from start to finish. It went through edits. It went through more edits… and then it went out into the wide and scary world of agents.


I have to say — it did well there. I got a LOT of rejections, but I did get a fair number of requests too. And while the agents who read it liked it, there was never that push to take it and me on as clients. Maybe it’s just not ready — or maybe the market isn’t ready. I’ll be damned if I know and I’ll drive myself crazy trying to figure it out.


So, for now, my beloved manuscript is going to sit in the proverbial drawer on my harddrive. It’s a hard blow to take, especially when it’s something you’ve loved for so long. But… it happens, even to the best of us.


Now, bring on novel number three. Here’s hoping it’s  “the one”.

2 Responses to “Hardest Part of Being A Writer…”

  1. E.B. Black says:

    Your adventures in writing sound a lot like mine. I wrote a first book that I don’t often count because it was so bad and that I started when I was still a teen. I put my heart and soul into the second book and received sixty rejections. I had to shelve it because I wound up agreeing with the rejections I received and it sucked because I put all that hard work into it.

    Good news though, I think my third book is the one. Not really querying it, mostly planning on self-pubbing and I feel really excited about it, so good luck to you as well.

    I know how hard it is to do all that work!

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